Most of you reading this are probably my Facebook friends. You may have even been involved in the opinion poll I decided to conduct on Facebook to assist me in completing my latest Abnormal Psychology assignment. This was the question (as written by my psych professor):
"Do you think alcoholism and substance abuse are results of "moral weakness" or a type of disease?"
As I suspected, there were mixed responses. In my experience talking with people about substance abuse and addiction the opinions are usually far from center, but one extreme or the other. I decided to write this blog because I too have an opinion about the subject. Honestly, did you think you'd get away without hearing my opinion? =)
FYI - so I don't have to type it out over and over, we'll include alcoholism under the 'umbrella' of substance abuse.
Substance abuse is a major concern worldwide. Because of this, a large amount of focus from the realms of law enforcement, psychology, health care, science, special interest groups, etc. has been put into the prevention, understanding, and even a 'cure' for substance addiction. Now, I've done a lot of research on this topic and my opinion definitely does not lie in favor of the 'moral weakness' argument. Let me explain why...
As some of you may know, my husband is a recovering drug addict. Chad gave me permission to tell his whole story but I don't feel that's necessary. If you know Chad then you know he's an amazing person. He's absolutely crazy, kind-hearted, hilarious, and caring. He was raised by two equally amazing people who taught him about the strength of faith in God and always pointed him in the right direction, even if he veered off that path more than a few times. Even after I started getting to know Chad and learned about his drug addiction I was one who believed that addiction was a result of weakness. Through my relationship with Chad, and my faith in God that He would get us both through that dark place, I learned some very valuable lessons.
Have you ever heard the Plato quote “Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a harder battle.”? Aside from the studies and all the "facts", we are all human. There are so many elements that go into shaping a person from birth all the way until death. I've not only had the pleasure of learning from Chad, I've also most recently been learning from friends of his who are also fighting the battle to beat addiction. These people's stories humble me. They are in no way weak, they are some of the strongest people I've ever met. There are so many reasons why a person might turn to drugs or alcohol. It may not even be that the person has a specific reason but just experiments with drugs or alcohol and becomes physically or psychologically dependent. We must admit, most of us have experienced with at least alcohol at some point. Though I won't go into it, I think it's important to note that it's been confirmed that genetics influence substance abuse. Studies conducted with twins, families, and adoption indicate that certain people are genetically vulnerable to drug abuse.
Substance addiction is a physical and psychological dependence. I think this is common knowledge but I'm not sure to what extent. Addiction is a struggle of the mind and body. I have not personally experienced the perils of addiction first hand and therefore I cannot know how it really feels. I do feel like having an extremely close, open, and honest relationship with an addict gives me a little room to talk. To say that a person overtaken by substance addiction is weak, and a stronger person would be able to put it down at their first thought of wanting to, is nothing short of ignorance. I was ignorant to think that Chad didn't care about me or himself because "he just wouldn't quit doing drugs". I was ignorant to think that his friends were "losers" because they just "wouldn't get their act together". It was easy for me to assume that it was that easy because I had never been in that situation. A person who is addicted to drugs or alcohol is not in their right mind. No person in their right mind would WANT to be an addict. I have watched the precious man that I love struggle with something that he ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT WANT for the entire seven years of our relationship -the last three and a half years spent sober (Praise God!). =)
I don't want to offend anyone or begin a debate, or more likely an argument. Maybe you do not agree with me and that's your prerogative. Even if you hold to your opinion of the 'weakness argument', maybe a more kind and loving approach could be taken. This blog comes from nothing but love because I care so much for my husband and I am so blessed to have had him teach me this huge lesson in my life. I think our compassion and longing to understand others should be unconditional and never ending. I only want to possibly help people understand that he, along with so many other people struggling with addiction and other hard-to-understand circumstances, are God's children too. We are all endlessly making mistakes but kindness and an attempt to understand others will not only make a difference for them, it will also drastically change your life.
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